It has been 18 agonizing years since little Madeleine McCann—just three years old—disappeared without a trace during a family holiday. Now, her mother, Kate McCann, has opened up about a decision that haunts her every single day.

In May 2007, Madeleine went missing from the family’s holiday apartment in Praia da Luz, Portugal. That evening, her parents—Kate and Gerry—were dining at a restaurant only about 100 meters away and kept returning to check on their sleeping children.

But when they returned later that night, tragedy had struck—Madeleine was no longer there.

Since that fateful night, the McCann family has never given up hope of finding her. In her deeply emotional 2011 memoir—Madeleine: Our Daughter’s Disappearance and the Endless Search—Kate revealed a detail that seemed harmless at the time but has since become a lifelong torment.

On the night Madeleine disappeared, Kate requested a table at the Ocean Club restaurant that directly faced their apartment. After the incident, she discovered a chilling note in the reservation book written by a restaurant staff member

“In my horror,” Kate recalled, “I saw the note—undoubtedly accidental and only meant to explain why we requested that particular table—that we wanted to sit near the apartment because our little one was left there alone and we would be checking on her periodically.”

Kate confessed: “We regret it bitterly, and will carry that regret to the end of our days.”

Now, the case has once again drawn attention as German prosecutors focus on a man who may hold the key to answers after nearly two decades.

Christian Brueckner, a 47-year-old German national, is currently on trial in Braunschweig for a series of sexual crimes—including the rape of a 72-year-old woman and sexual assault of a teenage girl—all occurring near the area where Madeleine vanished.

Brueckner had long been a suspect under scrutiny. In 2020, after three years of thorough investigation, German authorities officially named him the prime suspect in Madeleine’s disappearance.

The evidence against him has become increasingly clear. Reports indicate Brueckner visited a remote reservoir shortly after Madeleine went missing—a site later searched by police following a tip-off from a friend.

This friend claimed to have seen images and videos of Brueckner at that location—a chilling detail that matched other documents seized by investigators.

Furthermore, a shocking document was found on a laptop used by Brueckner in Portugal. Just four months before Madeleine disappeared, he allegedly created a Hotmail email account to write a brutal fictional story involving a mother and her 5-year-old daughter.

Inspector Christian Stampa described it: “It was a detailed story about a mother and daughter being kidnapped and put into a van. It described violent, brutal behavior and sexual abuse—one was raped in front of the other.”

As the trial continues, a letter purportedly written by Brueckner has surfaced in which he claims there are “decisive questions” that cannot be answered—as a way to deny involvement.

In the letter—translated by The Sun—Brueckner writes: “Those are the important, decisive questions—without any answers.”

“Was I or my car seen near the crime scene that night?

“Is there my DNA evidence at the scene? Is there the victim’s DNA in my car? Is there any evidence from the victim in my possession? Photos?

“And don’t forget—was there a body? The answer to all is no, no, no.”

It is unclear when the letter was written. But it is known that Brueckner lived near Praia da Luz from 2000 to 2017 and there are images and videos showing him near that reservoir.

Last week, German and Portuguese authorities completed a three-day search of a 120-acre area near Lagos, Portugal—suspected to be linked to the disappearance.

If no further charges are brought, Brueckner is expected to be released in September. Last year, he was acquitted in another case involving sexual assault allegations in Portugal.

As the whole world watches, the haunting question remains: Is this the moment when Madeleine’s family—and the millions who have followed her story—will finally get the answers they have waited 18 years for?